Kissing Mannequins and Climbing Mountains

It's been quite the interesting weekend so far. On Friday, a few first-year audiology grads and a few second years headed to Denver's Museum of Nature and Science to host a booth called "How Loud is Your Music?" That green-haired hottie I'm kissing in the picture below is named Gunter and he's an old mannequin re-purposed with a sound level meter. You stick your earbud in his ear to measure how loud your music is and then we give you crap about turning it down to prevent hearing loss. I'd go into the spiel right here and now, but honestly, I am too pooped to even think about decibel levels. Ask me later. You're probably doing it wrong. I have a mannequin to prove it.

This little device (pictures below) is called "weird ears" and is absolutely hilarious. You have someone speak into the red trumpet thing and you hear it in the ear on the other side. Très confusè.

This is Brenna, she's a weird-ears bad-ass.

Then, yesterday afternoon, I got a call from UNC's Outdoor Pursuits, a campus club that goes on adventure outings. I had gone to sign up for a bunch of them on the first day of classes, but they were already all full and I was heartbroken. I had been sort of banking on them to find hiking buddies and to gtfo of Greeley for a day or two. So anyway, I got a call saying that someone had dropped out and I was next on the waiting list, so I GOT TO GOOOO!

I met up with the group at 5:30am, looking and feeling like shitola. I had my tiny little daypack backpack and the other dozen students all had these hefty, campy-looking backpacks three times the size of mine, PLUS trekking poles, PLUS matching Outdoor Pursuits nalgene waterbottles. I obviously didn't get whatever memo there was and to make things worse, when I went up and introduced myself to one of the girls, she just looked at me and said "I think you need a tissue." And then I wiped my snotty nose on my sleeve in front of her, went and had a little anxiety attack in the bathroom, and almost didn't get on the van. Rough start, man. ROUGH start. But, as it turns out, the Outdoor Pursuit club rents equipment for free to students, so all those fancy-looking packs and poles didn't mean everyone was more experienced and prepared than I was, just that they didn't have their own gear. Made me feel a little better, but the snot-comment girl really threw me off. Whatever, I forced myself into the van and off we went!

We hiked the Ypsilon Lake Trail, which was 9 miles round trip and gorgeous the whole way. It was an interesting group. A couple people had never been on a hike before and others had been mountaineering since they were young'uns. Therefore, the going was slow. Sort of frustrating, but if I were in the newbie position, I woulda felt horrible to be constantly left behind at the back. The two trip leaders did a phenomenal job of keeping us all together and monitoring for altitude sickness, blisters, dehydration, etc. 

Ypsilon Lake!

What's a hiking trip without a selfie?!

 On the way up, we walked over some logs to get over the river. On the way back, the weather turned iffy right as we got to the crossing. We may or may not have walked over a raging river while being hit with hail. That's Colorado for ya.

My favorite part about hiking is dreaming about what amazing non-campy food you're going to mow down on when the day's over.  The group spent a lot of time fantasizing about Chinese food, ice cream, and the elk burgers in Estes Park (which are apparently spectacular?). I ended up at Chipotle and you bet I paid the extra $1.95 for guacamole. It's been a good day.

Celery sux

Sitting here at 11pm (in the living room since the internet signal doesn't run the extra 10 feet to my bedroom, WADDUP, RESLIFE, C'MON) and I'm going through a whole bunch of celery because it's gonna go bad in the next couple days. I only bought it to use one stalk in a recipe, so wtf are you supposed to do with the rest of it?! What better time to eat celery than now, when I'm too tired to taste how boring it is with nothing on it.

Today marks the end of day 3 of graduate school. My to-do list is longer than my body, I'm beginning to question all life choices, and my biggest upset is that I have to take my nose ring out for clinical practicum. There is SO much other stuff to be upset about, but for some reason, I'm fixated on this. It's so dumb, but getting my nose pierced was my I'm-a-badass-independent-college-sophomore-and-having-metal-on-my-face-shows-it-even-though-my-mom-doesn't-like-it phase and I don't feel like I wanna be done with that phase yet. I really, really like my silver booger (as Eliza calls it). If grad school = no face badassery, then I guess I have to comply, but I need something else to make me feel good and proud of myself. Open to suggestions. Not open to piercings in other places though, thank you.

This post literally has no point, I'm just sleepy and lonely and sick of reading my textbook and sick of eating celery. The end.

GRAD SCHOOL: a new beginning, sort of

Currently sitting in my living room not reading my textbook and instead eating chocolate-covered honeycomb, which was an impulse buy when I went to the organic grocery store for chickpea flour...which was for an impulse pizza craving. As you may be able to tell, I've just been goin' with the flow. My body knows what it wants and that's mostly carbs and chocolate right now... Which surprisingly seems to be working for me, because I feel better about myself than I did last year at this time. Life transitions = comfort food. ANYWAY!

Today was my very first day of graduate school! I made a great first impression by showing up a little late to the orientation breakfast because I was wrapped up in watching Beyonce's 16 minute VMA performance and eating pre-breakfast breakfast. Mah bad. I still got there for the free coffee, though. If this is any indicator of how the semester's gonna go, I'm diggin' it. Too bad that's probably not an indicator of how the semester's actually gonna go.

Here's my class list:

1. Neuroanatomy and Neurophysiology of Communication
2. Foundations of Research and Writing
3. Advanced Audiology
4. Research in Audiology
5. Clinical Practicum in Audiology
6. Auditory Physiology
7. Amplification 1

I've only gotten a taste of three of them so far, but I think I'm gonna like it. I also think I'm gonna be doing a lot of crying and eating chocolate-covered honeycomb within the next few weeks because a) there's going to be a lot of stress and b) that's what I usually do, anway. I'm currently the only one signed up for Advanced Audiology because (omfg) EVERYONE has taken it already. Most of the people in my program (there are 8 of us) completed their bachelor's degree here or took all of their pre-requisites here, so I think I'm the only one coming from a different background. YAYYY. That puts me with an extra 3 credits. Full time status for grad students is 9 credits and I'm taking 15, PLUS a 10 hour/week assistantship. I am very afraid, but also confident that my current one cup/day coffee consumption could be increased tenfold and could therefore elongate the length of my day by at least 3-4 hours. I WILL SURVIVE (HEY HEY).

I'm sorry this post is so long and picture-less, but I have ONE MORE really really REALLY important thing to tell you all and that is that my assistantship lets me get paid for doing hearing screenings on dogs, which essentially means that I get to play with deaf puppies EVERY WEEK. *happy dance with intermittent woofing and howls of stress-reduction*

A rocky start in the Rocky Mountains

Finally finally FINALLY got into the mountains today for the first time since moving to Colorado. The last time I hiked was over two weeks ago, which is RIDICULOUS AND UNACCEPTABLE. Oh, how I missed it! I hiked the Lily Mountain Trail at Rocky National Park. It was about an hour and a half away from Greeley, which sort of stinks, but it's a gorgeous drive, so I guess I can deal. I'll be blowing through a lot of gas, though :/ I left at 7am and started feeling sick on the way there. Stopped at the Visitor's Center in Estes Park to grab a map and may or may not have gotten sick in the bathroom, but DAMN IT I DROVE ALL THE WAY THERE AND I WASN'T JUST GONNA TURN AROUND.

The trailhead was basically invisible and I had to park on a blind curve in a tiny dirt pull-off that had enough space for about a car and a half. The first thing I saw at the base of the trail was a big sign about mountain lions-- it warned not to hike by yourself, not to wear headphones to stay alert, and to be a little noisy on the trail so that you would scare the cats away. Of COURSE, that freaked me out and I immediately started in on worst-case scenarios, but started the trail anyway (sans headphones, duh). I was in the middle of nowhere, hadn't seen signs of anyone else on the trail, and was scared out of my mind that I was going to be mauled to death by a mountain lion, so I started belting out the first thing that came to mind: Avril Lavigne. I sang Complicated the ENTIRE way up the mountain, the same stupid verses over and over again, which is so weird because I can't remember the last time I even heard that song. I sometimes switched back and forth between the Weird Al version, too. Definitely a memorable hike.

It was also memorable because I can't remember ever struggling so hard on a hike. First of all, I was still feeling sick (even though the little Visitor's Center event made things a little better), and then the altitude was my other big problem. I gave myself a week in Colorado to adjust to the high altitude before attempting a hike, but I should've given it a bit more time. I was winded so easily, and the singing didn't help much either. I kept having to stop and it was frustrating to be physically incapable of going my normal speed. I prevailed, despite taking twice as long as I normally would. Conquered 9,740 feet elevation!

Gorgeous wildflowers everywhere!

When I got to the top, I met a retired pilot named Kevin and we hit it off pretty well. He gave me the mountain lion low-down and apparently I sang Avril for nothing because he's been coming to the Rockies for years and never seen one. The view was 360 degrees and he reeled off all the names of the mountain ranges (which I now forget, but it was a lovely gesture. I repeated each of them after him in a real effort to memorize them, even though they all look fairly similar). He insisted on snapping a picture to commemorate my first Rocky hike, and then we hiked back down together.

On my way back to Greeley, I couldn't resist stopping at the Dam Store, a tiny little souvenir shop between Loveland and Estes Park. It had a huge sign advertising 99 cent bison jerky, so how could you NOT stop?! Not only did I purchase bison jerky, I also bought ostrich jerky and kangaroo jerky. I've been out of my comfort zone and trying new shit out the wazoo, so what's a few more questionable meat products in the grand scheme of things?!

Lena Dunham stars in a new show about my life

This trailer for season 4 of Girls is exactly how my day went yesterday. Except Lena wears clashy patterns better than I do. Le sigh.

The worst day I've ever had, turned WONDERFUL.

Currently recovering from the shock of a bike wipe-out and the extreme kindness of the staff in the dean's office of the Nursing and Health Sciences department. I cancelled all my plans for today and spent most of the day watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding (for the 600th time, no regrets, OPAH) and back episodes of New Girl while I needlepointed little cacti on things with little mood-lifting reminders. Needed a day to just feel sorry for myself and reel myself back into my comfort zone for a little while.

I finally worked up the chutzpah to go to the gym and work off some of the day's gloominess, but then, as if today wasn't already bad enough, I wiped out hard on my bike in front of a bunch of the incoming freshmen. Went over the handlebars, but only ended up with a few scrapes and bruises, thank goodness. Mainly just bruised the ol' ego. That was the breaking point, though. Held it together until I locked my bike up and hit the nearest restroom in the closest building (which happened to be the building I'll have all my classes in), and then let loose. Felt like a scene straight out of an 80's coming-of-age movie. I thought the bathroom was empty and really went for it-- that drippy, heart-wrenching sobbing that only happens when you're at the end of your rope. But when I came out, there was someone from the dean's office waiting for me outside the door. She ushered me into her office, listened to my homesick ramblings, made me feel better, and sent me off with tissues and peppermint patties.

Things started improving after that. Met up with a couple new friends (!!!) to check out the free food-fest post-convocation. Gluten free tacos, chocolate-covered bananas, corn on the cob grilled in the husk... yeah, things got better. Getting out of my apartment and interacting with actual humans that weren't Zooey Deschanel was what I needed. Also, real food cooked by people who know what they're doing (unlike me) was refreshing, too.

And THEN. AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN I came home and checked my mail box-- LO AND BEHOLD, LETTERS. You all have to understand, I don't think this blog post accurately conveys how truly awful I felt today. Today has been the worst homesickness, the worst loneliness, the worst case of the blues I've had in a long, long time, maybe ever. And then I came home to a mailbox literally overflowing with mail. I immediately cried for the billionth time today, but the happiest of tears there ever could be. So grateful to have such lovely friends and family at home. So grateful for the perfect timing; just when I needed it most. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU. I actually can't say thank you enough. The moment I checked my mailbox is definitely in my top 10 happiest moments in my life thus far. Overwhelmed. I can't wait to write each and every one of you back.

Negative bullshit, sorry I'm a downer

Putting yourself out there is important, but giving yourself a break is important, too. I feel like death today. It may be I caught a cold or something, or it may be the stress of constantly pushing myself out of my comfort zone finally catching up to me. I had another full day planned-- I had signed up for a guided group tour of Greeley and then made coffee plans with a potential new friend, but I had to bail on both. I really try to push through something even if I might not want to go, but there is a point where misery outweighs the benefit of the outing. Today is that day. If I met up with Dav for coffee, I would be a boring, miserable, unsociable schmuck. 

Here's some more negative stuff that just needs to get out of my head and be acknowledged:

1. Greeley smells like poop. It legitimately smells like absolute crap all the time. And it's not the quaint Vermont manure smell that I sort of like. A family friend went to school here years ago and mentioned the smell, but I didn't think much of it. Now I understand. As soon as you cross the Greeley city line, BAM, POOP SMELL. As soon as you've hit the next town, sweet relief. I think I'll adjust to it eventually. I friggin' hope so. 
2. I'm trying so hard to be a bar person and I'm just not. I can bar hop for a while and I love to go out dancing, but I hate spending money on drinks, I hate getting hit on by the creepy regulars, I hate sitting in one place for more than a half hour, and I really don't even like being drunk that much. I can handle it all maybe one night a week tops, but to all y'all who go multiple times a week? I'm impressed, but not jealous. Do yo' thang and I'll join you for maybe an hour of it.
3. The altitude change is giving me problems. I wanna hike and run and bike and not get dizzy or winded immediately. The first night I went out to a bar, I had two drinks over the course of several hours and I was done. Freaks me out not knowing my limits anymore. SO READY TO BE ADJUSTED, PLEASE AND THANK YOU.

That's it. At least my negativity list is fairly short. Here's a quick positivity list to balance out:

1. I've picked up needlepointing and started a cute little section of the bathroom wall to fill with tiny 4-inch embroidery hoop projects with inspirational mantras. It's barfy but, yo, whatever it takes to cheer myself up.
2. The train tracks right outside my window used to wake me up and annoy me every time a train went by (ALL THE TIME), but now I've gotten accustomed to it and sorta like the train horn. 
3. uhhh that's it, i'm not feeling very positive today

Made a friend! Didn't get married!

BIG NEWS. MADE A FRIEND. REPEAT, MADE A FRIEND. MAYBE MADE TWO FRIENDS, IF YOU COUNT THE BARISTA WHO NOW KNOWS MY NAME.

Okay, I'll stop yelling in caps locks, but just know that everything I type in this post is very! exciting! and I'm still! screaming! in my head! I met this hip girl from Portland who also just so happens to be in the audiology doctorate program. SCORE. SO MUCH SCORE. She's been here for a month or so already, so she agreed to take me out to all the decent bars she knows and I agreed to give her a little gym equipment tutorial (because that shit is scary and hella embarrassing trying to figure out on your own in front of all the 300 lb football players). So, not only have I found a going-out buddy, I've also got a gym buddy, too. THANK JESUS.

More good news! I am now officially a regular at Margie's Blue Mug coffee shop because the barista knows my name and taught me how to pronounce acai (ah-sigh-eeee, apparently) and there are gluten free bagels, which means I will practically be living there. Hooray for second homes and carbs that won't make me sick.

More good news! Found a thrift shop with a killer 99 cent rack and an overwhelming amount of clothing ranging from clinic-appropriate to the standard hipster/grandma chic. Psyched. I scored a couple things, but the most noteworthy is this suede leather vest that fits perfectly and makes me feel like a true Westerner. I will find a way to wear it and werk it, even if I feel like an imposter/dweeb.

Here's the weird anecdote of the day: the very first person I met was right when I got to orientation, this guy from Florida. We sort of bonded a little bit over moving across the country by car. I said something and used the word "we," referring to me and my dad, and he immediately startled and was like, "Oh, you and your husband? I didn't see a ring." I didn't even try to hold it in, I was like, "UHHHHHHHH WUT. UHHHH YOU WERE LOOKING FOR A RING? UHHH NO." So. Here I am in graduate school. I guess this is the time people start being anxious about those things? That's the first time I've ever had someone assume I was married. Very strange, because just the previous day when I was giving myself a campus tour, I kept getting mistaken for an incoming freshman. I feel weird now knowing that people are specifically looking at my ring finger...

That's all for now. I'm pooped and it's only 3pm. Nap time. I have plans later to head to Fort Collins because one of the girls I toured Spain with is randomly there for the rest of this week! I went from zero to 60 in one day. Life is good, ladies and gentlemen.

How To Keep Yourself Sane With No Friends In A New City

1. Get out of the apartment.
2. If it's sometimes too hard to leave the apartment, at least do something productive. Spend time decorating. Spend time eating Mexiglop on the floor. Spend time complaining about the internet out loud to yourself.
3. People watch. Try to copy that cool girl's hair style. Try to compliment said girl on her hair style, but chicken out at the last minute. 
4. Take yourself on a tour de coffee shops. It's okay to spend money on gallons of coffee because it's research.
5. Drive to Target for necessities (just kidding, cute baubles) and "explore the city." (i.e. get lost and cry and reassure yourself that you'll figure out how to get home from Target eventually)
6. Determine the best midweek day to watch Star Wars nerds play Irish music and take shots of Jamison. (Tuesday).
7. Locate the nearest yoga studio. Locate the next nearest yoga studio because the closest one is bikram and fuck that. Think about going.
8. Wander the isles of the local JoAnn Fabrics and Michaels because it's familiar and there are craft supplies you might need someday in the future.
9. Bicycle around town because you can check out a bunch more junk up close without having to pay for parking.
10. Find one of the many freshman orientation groups and follow them around until they lead you to free food.

These are my highly useful and beautifully honed techniques for keeping yourself occupied in a new city. Use them as you will. 

Weepy, but Productive

Two days ago, when I first got to Greeley, it was hard because I'd been in the car for so long and seeing my new town (city?) was a shock to the system. I thought, "this is definitely the hardest part." Yesterday, I moved into my apartment, did all the last-minute apartment shopping, grocery shopping, etc that goes into picking up and setting down in a new place. It was exhausting, but I was excited to have that one huge mystery solved. I thought, "this was the hardest part and it's is finally over."

Now, it's Monday, my third day in Greeley. By FAR the hardest day. I dropped my dad off at the airport this morning, which was awful. Just awful. So hard. All of a sudden I was completely alone and 2,000 miles from home, lost in Denver traffic at rush hour, and feelin' wimpy. 

At a loss for what to do/how to stop crying/how to spend my day productively, I threw together a to-do list and that's helped me keep busy and explore the area by myself. I got my student ID card, opened bank accounts, had a meeting with the financial aid office, made a meeting with my program advisor, gave myself a tour of the campus, and went for a run (and had to stop pretty quick because the altitude is so freaky). I'm going to spend the rest of the day making my room feel like home. It's depressingly blank-walled right now and it literally makes me feel panicky looking at it. I think a trip to Target is in order...

Orientation is tomorrow, so hopefully there will be some human interaction goin' on. Don't know how long I could sustain myself like I have been today--  you can only go full-throttle for so long. I'm pretty good at keeping myself entertained, but it would be nice to make friends. Maybe. 

Hello, Greeley. When Can I Say Goodbye?

WELLLL, I shouldn't have blasted so hard on the midwest earlier today. As it turns out, Greeley basically fits into the midwest category and it looks like I'm going to have to get used to it. I knew it was going to be flat, but I didn't realize how flat and I knew it wasn't going to be right in the mountains, but I didn't realize just how far they'd be. It's more city than I thought it would be, too. Lots of low-income housing, LOTS of liquor stores, and traffic lights long enough to do a dozen Chinese fire drills with time to spare. It's a big change from Vermont, where there was one traffic light in the whole county and getting a second one caused an uproar.

The lack of trees is startling. There are very few all along Route 70 from Illinois to Colorado, but they start cropping up just as you hit Greeley. Mostly to line the streets, but hey, I'll take it. I already miss the woods. I also miss being able to drive 10 minutes up the road and having a mountain to climb. Looks like it'll be a bit of a drive if I want to hike. SAD FACE, SAD SAD FACE.

My dad and I arrived in Greeley around 4pm and drove up and down the streets for a few hours, trying to get a feel for the place. Found my apartment (move-in day's tomorrow!), the closest grocery store, the less sketchy grocery store a little further away, and the Target (my mom and I used to make day-trips to Target because the closest one was 2 or 3 hours away in Plattsburgh. It was quite the event, but NOW I have one less than 5 minutes away!). We scoped out good potential diners, a gluten free pizza place, the closest craft store (Jo-Ann Fabrics, 1.3 miles away), etc etc. We did a lot of exploring in a short amount of time and it definitely took a toll on me. Greeley was not what I expected, we had been in the car for almost 3 days straight, and this whole summer has been a huge transition period in general. Aaaaaand cue the public meltdown at Perkins, a tiny little chain diner that apparently has good pie? I dunno, it was embarrassing but necessary, and now that I'm all cried out and all the suspense about what Greeley's going to be like is gone, I feel a bit better.

My dad and I are staying in a Heritage Inn for the night (though the Chinese family who owns it calls it the Meritage Inn and can't make up their minds about whether to legally change the name. Colorado is weird). This place is awesome. In a spunky, thrown-together sort of way. The lobby is decorated with a Christmas tree, our room has two large paintings that are exact replicas of each other hanging on adjacent walls, the toilet has snowman decals on it, and there are themed suites with spray-painted doors. Unfortunately, we're not in one. You could call this place a dump, orrrr you could say it has character and enjoy the quirks. We're choosing the latter.

 

Well, Greeley, it's been a weird first day full of ups and downs, but mostly downs. Hopefully tomorrow is mostly ups.

Midwest Banality

Let me save you a trip to Kansas: it's flat, dullish green, oil rigs dot the landscape, and the answer to every question is Jesus. To quote David Bromberg--"Kansas City, here I come. They got some funky smellin' women, I'm gonna get me some." It's true, we all smell funky in Kansas because it's a trillion degrees and humid as all get out. Y'ALL SHOULD GET OUT.

                                

Missouri was very similar, except for one defining factor-- it's still legal to smoke indoors at a lot of places. We stopped at a Denny's and almost sat in the smoking section, just to ooh and ahh and cough.

Illinois was similar, too. Let me let you in on a little observation I've made. Most of the midwest looks exactly the same. I came close to choosing Northwestern for grad school, which is near Chicago, so I spent a lot of the time in Illinois celebrating the fact that I didn't have to live there. My parents used to live in Mt. Vernon, Illinois, so we made some pitstops to check out their old apartments. I WISH we had also made pitstops to check out the world's largest wind chime and world's largest golf tee, but we've been on a time crunch. I'll make it back there, though. You make time for what's important... wind chimes.

                               

                                

Here's my barefoot dad in front of the old TV station where he and my mom worked. He's been wearing that outfit for three days. 😷

Chris Demars' Road-Tripping Tips

The cross-country road trip is well underway! 1500 miles in two days ain't half bad. Thought I'd take a sec to let y'all in on some Chris Demars Road-Tripping Tips.

1) Mustard is key. You can put it on anything and it's instantly delicious. Cabbage, bologna, crackers, etc.

2) Keep your pants clean by wiping your cheeto-powdered hands on your socks. No one will know.

3) Keep a paper towel tucked in your visor for unexpected spills or for the intermittent crying jags.

4) The google maps iPhone app is not to be trusted. Our ol' interstate road atlas (published in 1989) gets the job done.

                                     

5) $35/night hotel rooms are "vintage" and "usually not full of bed bugs." 

6) If taking your bike along, there's no need to spend money on a bike rack. Just spend a few hours macgyvering one from garden hose and U-bolts. Continue adjusting at every gas station stop to ensure security.

                                      

7) If you put cruise control on, it frees up your feet to stick 'em out the window! 

                                     

8) No need to stop at restaurants. Maybe a diner for dinner, but breakfast and lunch are road trip snacks-- gherkin pickles, bologna sandwiches, mixed nuts, chocolate chips. Repeat.

                                     

9) The best road beverage is raspberry Snapple. Two days in and he's 9 Snapples deep. Water? What's that?

10) Make sure the Jonas Brother's cover of Poor Unfortunate Souls from the Little Mermaid is loaded onto your iPod. "It's catchy!"

                                    

Vt Bucket List

At the beginning of the summer, I wrote a short list of things I wanted to do or accomplish before I headed west. I managed 16/18, which is nottttt too shabby. I'll do the llama walk (in case you're curious...) and hike Mansfield some other time. I know I'll be back eventually, so no rush. Here's the list in all its crossed-off glory:

1. Hike Camel's Hump
2. Hike the Skyline Ridge (sort of-- burned myself out and only made it halfway or so before having to turn around. Crossing it off anyway, fight me.)
3. Hike Sterling Pond - (bonus-- hiked at sunset and it was MAGICAL)
4. Kayak across Elmore Lake (bonus-- went at night and there were stars and ahhhhhhhhhhh)
5. Onion rings from Al's (eh, they were sort of bad)
6. Fried pickles from Mountain View
7. Strawberry picking
8. Run a 10k (couldn't actually fit a race into my schedule, so I just mapped one on my own. That counts, right?)
9. Do another art show
10. Visit a brewery (Citizen Cider, VT P&B, Lost Nation, and Switchback. CHECK.)
11. Balloon fest sunrise launch
12. ArtsRiot truckstop (Ethan Allen burger from Burger Barn. Mmmmmmmmmfff)
13. Stargaze in South Hero
14. Bike the causeway
15. Maple creemee, duh (might've crossed this one off a few times...)
16. Hike Elmore again (bonus-- hiked in the dark)
17. Llama trail walk 
18. Hike Mansfield

I think I did an okay job at tackling Vermont this summer. Time to move on to some bigger mountains.

IT'S HAPPENING

Last day at home. Waterworks in 3...2............GO

My mom took the day off to help me pull my shit together for the big day tomorrow. It ended up being a fairly normal day, aside from the intermittent bouts of crying. Something would set one of us off and then it was a domino effect and soon there were tears all around. Truly heart-wrenchingly barfy to witness. My mom and I had breakfast at McCarthy's (214 days until St. Patrick's Day rolls around, just in case you were wondering), made a quick trip to a needlepoint shop for crafting materials, did arts and crafts while watching 2-star Netflix movies, etc etc. It was a great last day.

Both my brother, Ben, and Eliza work at Ben and Jerry's, so naturally, my going-away gift from Ben was Ben & Jerry's gear. Watch out, Colorado, there's going to be a new girl in town and she's going to be wearing tie-dyed cows. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (already got chocolate fudge brownie ice cream stains on my shirt because I'm a champion)

Look how cute these parents are. Ugh, so cute, can't even stand it

Found my favorite cider, Citizen Cider's "The Dirty Mayor" in CAN-form!! Stocked up on that big time. Apparently Citizen's doesn't ship to Colorado yet, so I'm gonna need a new go-to bar drink (open to suggestions, potential new Coloradoian friends! <---how do you say that? Is there an actual word for someone from Colorado? These are the things I need to find out asap, plz help).

Here are my two cents about packing: God bless vacuum seal bags. God bless Linnea for telling me about vacuum seal bags. God bless my parents for having a vacuum because I didn't realize you actually needed a vacuum to get the advertised squish-down effect. God bless University of Northern Colorado for accepting me into grad school even though I can be a real dimwit. These stupid plastic bags are the only reason I haven't (yet?) had a massive packing breakdown. I am cool as a cucumber and confident that I can bring enough clothes to overwhelm my tiny apartment closet/dresser/room in general. It'll feel just like home. Speaking of feeling just like home, most of what I packed is just nesting materials that make me feel like I'm home and in my own space. Wall decor/kitschy baubles everywhere take precedence over kitchenware and toiletries and other crap that is important but not important, you know? 

That long white thing I'm holding is 2 full-sized pillows shrunken into oblivion.
CAN YOU BELIEVE IT BECAUSE I CAN'T.
LOOK HOW THIN THAT BAG IS, JUST LOOK.

My trunk, feelin' fat and sassy

...Here we go.

What a Great Escape!

What better way to spend one of my last few days in Vermont than leaving Vermont to go to New York?! LOLOLOL. Yesterday my boyfriend, Jack, and I drove 5ish hours to spend 5ish hours at the Great Escape. WORTH IT.

When the woman at the parking entrance cheerily told us to "have a Great Escape!" we knew it was going to be a good day. We splurged on the fast pass thingies and everything was suddenly manageable. We friggin' RAN the place. Crowds are usually my amusement park downfall. I hate them. HATE THEM. Being in a throng of pushy people who all want what they want when they want it makes me want to punch everything. But since we went in the afternoon on a Monday, the place wasn't too bad. After a small panic attack while strapped into the Boomerang (who can blame me, that thing is a claustrophobic deathtrap before it gets going), things went smoothly. We hit everything on our to-do list-- including the Mega Wedgie, because who can resist a ride with a name like that?!

Jack had the brilliant idea to bring along disposable cameras, so I currently have zero pictures to add to this blog post. But MANNNN there'll be some good ones in a few years when we finally get around to developing them. (Just kidding, we'll do it soon because I've been spoiled with digital cameras and it's killing me not being able to see them immediately.)

(Cheese warning------> ) Said goodbye to Jack this morning, which SUCKED, but I'm glad we got to take a whole day to go do something unusual and rollercoaster-y. :) / :( Next time I see him, we'll be doing something unusual and Colorado-y.

The Vermontiest of Vermonters

SO MUCH HAPPENED THIS WEEKEND... though I can pretty much sum it up in one word: Vermonty. It was the ultimate Vermonty experience. I did enough Vermonty activities to choke a horse (side note: we were in close proximity to horses this weekend and did not choke any of them, just fyi, it's an expression, just don't even worry about it). Also just wrote 'Vermonty' too many times and it's not even a good-sounding word. It's after midnight and it's been a day filled with Vermonty things, so gimme a break.

ANYWAY. My parents, brother, and I (and J-Lou, too, for a day!) escaped to a little spot in Elmore, Vermont. No cell service, way in the back road boonies. We rowed around the pond in leaky row boats, bushwacked around the woods (we have the scrapes and bruises to show for it), jumped off slimy pond rocks, ATV'd around sometimes-questionable trails, lay around in hammocks, went for runs on the old logging roads, watched hayers clear the fields, played cards on the deck, night-hiked Elmore Mountain, etc etc. Like I said-- VERMONT. SO MUCH OF IT. I'm overwhelmingly grateful to have my last weekend in Vermont be spent outside and with the people I love most dearly.

If this were my every day view, I would go running a lot more...

J-Lou's stargazing tent. Absolutely perfect.

This swirly thing is called a 'tedder.' WHO KNEW.
I've been calling it a swirly thing my whole life. And probably won't stop, at this point.

Top of Elmore! Dark and scary, but neither of us broke an ankle.

Hammin'

I took a break from the Vermont-fest happening in Elmore to go participate in the Cambridge Festival of the Arts in Jeffersonville on Saturday. My mom (THANKS, MOM) came with me for 1) company, 2) help setting up the tent because, let's be honest, I suck, 3) moral support-- to remind me to talk my art UP, not down. A little modesty is good, but too much is... too much. The self-doubt involved in displaying your own artwork and standing by while people either walk right past or stop to take a look is crippling. These art shows are a pain in the butt and can be such a hit to the self confidence, but I always come out of it glad to have experienced it. That being said, I did pretty darn well. :) I'm satisfied with the number of prints I sold, and even more satisfied with the number of people who smiled when they saw my work. Cheerful artwork is mucho, mondo, SO important to me.

So, that was that. Back at home and ready for three more days of New England lovin'. It's so scary to be able to count on one hand the number of days until I pack my life into a tiny Honda Civic. It's also scary to think that I haven't really started packing my life yet. HMMMMMMMM, BETTA GET ON THAT MAYBZ

GOODBYE, HOTEL.

Today was my last day of work at the hotel. It's been four years since my first day, and I'm gonna miss this place dearly. So many memz, so many hilariously awful guests. But that's another story. A whole lot of other stories. There might be a book already in the works, actually. I've seen some shit, y'all.

Anywho, I thought tonight would be just like any other ol' night and was feeling sorry for myself about 1) leaving my second home and 2) leaving my reliable source of income and 3) leaving the continental breakfast I sometimes stole fruit from, but THEN! Annmarie, my favorite housekeeper (jk she's our one and only housekeeper) started pep talking me and we DMC'd about life, love, bullshit, etc. It was like a middle school sleepover. She even did my hair. It was especially like middle school because having your hair cornrowed in 5th grade was a sign that you were one of the cool girls. I, unfortunately, was not one of the cool girls, BUT LOOK AT ME NOW, BITCHEZ. 5th grade me is cheering and grad school me is cheering too, but also sort of cringing.

I feel like Tricia from season 1 of Orange is the New Black,
 but, as Jack so perfectly put it, "less methy."

And then Bob, the manager, and his wife, Ryan, showed up with some delicious grapefruity German beer (that I drank despite the gluten) to hang out and say goodbye. I wasn't expecting any sort of going away party or unusual happenings on this last work shift, but it's been so lovely. Can't thank this tiny, tiny staff enough. 

*****UPDATE - It is 8:51pm and I'm leaving the hotel soon and the Avett Brothers are playing on Pandora and they always make me cry and I'm by myself in the lobby staring sadly into my own reflection in the front window. This is either the cliche end of a sad movie or that turning point where all of a sudden everything changes and the climax of the movie hasn't even happened yet. Oh god, and now that hallelujah song from Shrek is playing, I'm losin' it, bye

Mac n' Cheese, Please. Like, Immediately. NOWWW.

I've been sort of dairy free for a few years now, but I'm been pretty lenient every once in a while. Today was one of those days. "Pretty lenient" doesn't really even begin to cover it. I had a one-track mind, and that track was CHEESE.

I found a recipe for Vermont lover's hard cider mac n' cheese (HERE) last night at work and didn't stop thinking about it until I finally just went out and bought the ingredients. (Risky, because does anyone remember the last time I tried to make mac n' cheese? It went horribly wrong.) Truly irresistible. I was a helpless victim to the pull of cheese and carbs. There's nothing I love more than cheese and (gluten free) carbs.

The only ingredient I didn't have to buy was hard cider.
Woodchuck is a permanent fixture in the fridge. 

I dug in as soon as it was out of the oven and lemme tell ya, that recipe is a KEEPER. So, so, so, so so, good. It's 6 hours later and my body's like, "how did so much cheese happen?" and I'm like, "I dunno, but just make it work, plz." Moral of the story: cheese is good in moderation, but I don't know what moderation is. No regrets, though. Never regret a good, cheesy food baby.

Pre-Homesick Homesickness

Hi hiiii! To the few readers I might have (hi Mom, hi Mom's friends), I figured I might start up a new blog for this next chapter of my life (ew, so cliche, sorry) since my last blog, "You Trash It, I Eat It," is not quiiiite related to this subject. I loved that blog and will miss it dearly, but it's time to move on.

Speaking of moving on, THAT'S WHAT I'M DOING!!!!! In exactly a week and one day, I'll be hitting the road to Colorado. Grad school is calling and I'm semi-willingly answering. I'll be starting the Doctor of Audiology program at the University of Northern Colorado. Four more years of school. FOUR MORE YEARS. Better enjoy this last week-and-a-day of freedom, huh?

Grad school is intimidating, just like its scary mascot.
Grad school = mean bears. Great.

(Get ready for some cheeeeeese in 3...2....) I've been so focused on how potentially happy/miserable I could be in Colorado that I didn't realize how tough these last few weeks at home would be. I might go so far as to say that this could be the worst part of moving. The waiting part. The part where everything's still a mystery. Being homesick sucks, but anticipating homesickness almost sucks more. Those moments when something stupidly normal happens and you start tearing up because it suddenly dawns on you that you might miss it later. That nagging reminder to focus really hard on everything people are saying and doing because this moment is going to pass and it could be a potential precious memory.

...For example, I cried today because I realized I wouldn't be able to listen Zeb Norris on the radio in Colorado. I also cried because my brother made a mess of the peanut butter jar just how I hate it and I realized I was going to miss yelling at him about it. I also cried last night because the stars were so pretty, even though I'm fairly positive the stars will still be there when I move. IT'S STUPID, IT'S SO STUPID. I can't stop tearing up. I'm like a subtly leaky faucet.

Also, like an idiot, I overbooked myself. I was just abroad for a few weeks and I remember thinking as I was booking the tickets, "Might not be smart to schedule the return flight so close to the move date." And lo and behold, not smart. I gave myself exactly two weeks to recoup from the trip and gear up for the next one. And on TOP of that, I signed myself up for an art show, smack dab in the middle of the chaos. So I'm trying to pack for the move and get prints matted and register for classes and rent a canopy tent and say goodbye to the people I need to say goodbye to and fend off self-doubt about showing my artwork and soak up as much Vermont as possible, ALL AT ONCE.

This is a decent portrayal of what I feel like right now, as well as
 a good representation of the kind of stuff you'll find at the art show.
You are what you art, they say.

...Wish me luck. I'm going to need a bunch of it. Also, tissues.